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    17:06//Home: Abandoned.
    Wednesday, June 17, 2009 9:42 PM
    Yeah, you read the title right. I've pretty much been abandoned by my family. Well, it's only my mum, stepdad and sister.

    Well, it's a messsed up story. And I'm seriously at a loss for words. It started when my stepdad talked to me (well, more like scolded) about the job I wanted to get. It costs a lot to make the portfolio and it includes photoshoot and make-up. I told my grandma that I'll return it once I borrowed from her a bit (which is possible since I'm selling my damn PSP that I haven't used in ages). Then something kinda ticked me off when he said my grandma is outside of the family. Which is true, but is wrong because she used to be a family member, until my mum got her out of the household after she married my stepdad. So I kinda spurted out that incident... and it sure is too quiet now in my house.

    I borrowed from my grandma because I am very sure I can return back all the money in the future. This is for my future. But my parents think that, they're in the spotlight, and everything is about them only. Heck, my stepdad said if there's anything, I should ask my mum. Which is impossible to get anything from her, 'cos she can be VERY stingy at times. And best of all, my stepdad thinks the place I'm working in is a type of scam. Come on, I already went to the place and saw for myself. If you can't believe me, then my future in the household is in ruins. I'm already 20 years old; I can jolly well take good care of myself. I want my independence.

    Off-topic a bit; my mum keeps telling me not to take drugs, smoke, drink beer etc. Man, she doesn't know that I absolutely HATE all those things. I'd rather burn my money than buy those... things. I get stressed out very often, and what does she do? Keep forcing me to say out my problems. At least let me sort out my thoughts first before I say anything. I always feel suffocated in my house; this is one reason why I always go out and hang around places almost everyday.

    Anyways, I really don't know what to do now. I feel lost...

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